My friend Raymond brought me his manuscript. Would you publish my diet plan, Joe? But Ray, I publish only things about design!

Ray was unmoved. Just read it, he said. Joe, we love to kid ourselves. Learning foreign languages while sleeping, losing weight while pigging out... But to lose weight you must eat less, and "don't interrupt me" you can do it without such torture!

I read his manuscript and I had to give him credit - out of all diets around, his made the most sense to me. If only his text had not been so offensive and insensitive! We worked hard on Ray's prose, but that was about all that we could do--here's a sample:

Existing weight-loss programs demand 100 percent performance. If you stick to the plan, yours will be the flat tummy with a seductive accent of a navel, yours will be the neck of an antelope. But if you don't endure the torture, you get nothing, they say.

Let me tell you about the TV show I saw the other day. The host was quizzing a scantily dressed young woman on staying in shape.

"Do you exercise?"

"Yes, I run daily."

"How much?"

"Twelve miles."

"Twelve miles!" The host gives the young woman a longer look.

"Well, you have a beautiful body. No doubt about it. But you don't seem to eat much. How many times a day do you eat?"

"Once."

"And what do you eat then?"

"Salad... sometimes a bagel."

"So how frequently do you go to the bathroom?"

"Once a day."

"And what did you eat yesterday?"

"Nothing. I was so excited about meeting you."

"And you went to the bathroom?"

"Yes."

"Without eating?"

"Yes."

"Isn't that amazing, this ability of the body... even without eating."

But I would like to see my friend Scott - who operates a backhoe and a grader for a living, and who at 260 pounds would love to lose some weight - run 12 miles a day, 7 days a week, rain or shine, eating a salad a day, and sometimes a bagel. And then go to the bathroom, even without eating.

That would be 100 percent performance, ladies and gentlemen. If he could ever do it.

Fortunately, Ray keeps saying, you don't have to torture yourself to lose weight. It will be enough for you to eat less just two days a week - and to continue your regular eating habits for the remaining days of each week - to see amazing results.

This is a book for an intelligent reader. Are you are tired of weight-loss gimmicks? Suspicious of diet pills? Then this is a plan for you! A gradual reduction of body weight will be followed by a lesser demand for food. And this is the only way to lose fat permanently. Works like a charm! It will bring you back to life.

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